Of course, you’re going to stumble


Writing a book is no easy feat. Writing is no easy feat. I had to go anonymous before I found my voice.

Twitter, that is where I found my voice. Micro writing. I didn’t follow any local people for a long time. When I started up I had no idea what I would write about. NO IDEA. Being someone who has very random thoughts at very random times of day, I didn’t always have people to share conversations with. I was in my time of raising young children, so I started writing. These quick thoughts that expressed my joys, my inspiration, what made me laugh, what caught my eye, what had cool style, ooh! that’s innovative – *share*, all started to help me express myself. I was unsure I had ever expressed myself before.

Yes, I took photos. For many people, it is a form of expression. I don’t believe I used it that way though. I took my photography course so I could do it as a career. Obtaining the professional knowledge of the trade followed by moving across the country, without my tribe, left me feeling lost and lacking confidence. Not using the medium for expression meant that it was an object of obligation, something I kept forcing – I was supposed to make money off it. That’s not joy. What did bring about expression through photos for me was Instagram, of all things! I was back to capturing people I knew and pleasing scenes that caught my eye in the moment. Of all the money I invested in equipment, a portable studio, computers.. my iPhone became my most expressive creative tool.

Through the combination of Twitter and Instagram, my worlds merged. The words ‘kitchen culture’ kept flowing through my mind. I was making my own baby foods at the time, using fresh produce from my garden. The colors were mesmerizing and I wished to capture them. My Twitter friend Redawna was a food blogger. I occurred to me I wished to create a cookbook with her. Creating the layouts, and then instantly placing the photos in, during the shoot, caused a flashback of sorts. This type of work is where my expression began at age 16 – creating layouts and taking accompanying photos for books. Sharing information. The high school yearbook was where desktop publishing and photography were born into my reality.

So you see, my stumble has lasted for years. Well over 15 years. I don’t know why I chose this, I guess it’s true that some things choose you. What chose me was a life of creative expression, and it has presented itself with many blocks for me to work through and learn through. Because I am aware of the length of time some projects can take to come to fruition, I know not to pressure things; to force it, the creative process. People express themselves when they are ready and the best things happen in their own time.

Writing, and the creative process, are the ultimate journey of self discovery. Expect to go through an array of emotions – excitement, elation, doubt, fear, expectation, exhaustion, reasoning, guilt, acceptance, surprise, gratitude, pride. Start with baby steps – micro writing, journaling, keep a notebook handy for ideas or blurbs that come to mind. Heck, voice record yourself, your thoughts. Then move up to larger goals once your confidence and ability to express grow. Write in a safe space, where you feel at ease, it will allow entry into the zone, welcoming the muse.

Write daily. Write daily. Write daily.


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